How to Talk to Your Cat About Gun Safety: And Abstinence, Drugs, Satanism, and Other Dangers That Threaten Their Nine Lives

January 9, 2020 - Comment

The cats of America are under siege!  Long gone are the good old days when a cat’s biggest worries were mean dogs or a bath. Modern cats must confront satanists, online predators, the possibility of needing to survive in a post-apocalyptic wasteland, and countless other threats to their nine lives. For over four decades, the American

The cats of America are under siege! 
 
Long gone are the good old days when a cat’s biggest worries were mean dogs or a bath. Modern cats must confront satanists, online predators, the possibility of needing to survive in a post-apocalyptic wasteland, and countless other threats to their nine lives.

For over four decades, the American Association of Patriots have stood at the vanguard of our country’s defense by helping to prepare our nation’s cat owners for the difficult conversations they dread having with their pets. Written in a simple Q&A format, How to Talk to Your Cat About Gun Safety answers crucial questions such as, “What is the right age to talk to my cat about the proper use of firearms?” and “What are the benefits of my cat living a lifestyle of abstinence?” and especially “Why does my cat need to use the internet? Can’t he just play with yarn like cats used to do?”

Our country—and our cats—stand at a precipice. It will take courage, and it will take hard work, but armed with the knowledge within these pages, we can make our cats—and America—great again!

Product Features

  • Three Rivers Press CA

Comments

Anonymous says:

This Book Saved My Cat’s Ninth Life Let me just start by extending my utmost gratitude and appreciation to the author of this book. For years I watched in horror as my cat made decision after reckless decision, wasting eight of his precious God given lives. A tale as old as time…His first life was lost to marijuana poisoning. Second and third, sacrificial satanic rituals gone awry. Fourth life lost after a pistol misfire during a wild western style dual with the neighbor’s cat…(and don’t even get me started on the neighbor’s cat!) In his fifth life he hussled too hard. That one is particularly difficult for me to talk about without triggering a series of violent emotional fits, my apologies. During his sixth life he dabbled purr-fusely as an esteemed purr-fessional gigalo, falling victim to a wicked transmitted disease (Looking at you, neighbor’s cat!!!), the likes of which modern medicine has yet to find a cure. Much to my dismay, both his seventh AND eighth lives were spent smuggling weapons (and catnip) across…

Anonymous says:

this gay bashing book pretends to be lighthearted and funny I bought this book for a white elephant and originally thought it was hilarious, UNTIL I got to the part about how Jesus hates gays and “there’s no greater sin”. Then I flipped through another part and read how Jesus is against premarital sex and realized I was duped into buying a book about somebody’s unfortunate interpretation of the bible, and not a funny book with funny pics of kitties doing funny things… I will be returning this book asap

Anonymous says:

Depends on the cat One cat loved it, the other thought it was very boring. See pictures.

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